Friday 25 January 2013

Ai No Korea....

Saw a really funny comic the other day run the gauntlet of the Apollo Live audiences in Harlem. Chubby, bespectacled and generally very funny looking, he went on to advise everyone to always 'stay in their zone.' His reason for saying this? Well, apparently he had made the mistake of donning his friend's full-length fur coat for a night out....all was well until he claimed someone mistook him for a brown bear and shot him with a tranquilizer!

Extremely funny, but there was a morale to the tale....when fully aware of your shortcomings, don't put yourself in compromising situations!

For instance, can anyone please explain to me what the BBC were thinking when they aired a kids programme (or any other programme for that matter) with a Jimmy Saville spoof onboard? I mean, how many more chances do they want to get their act straight?! You almost feel like there is a hard-core 'Jim will fix it' appreciation cult within the corporation, with the members hellbent on perpetuating the legacy of their depraved icon, even if it means the worldwide broadcaster gets razed to the ground in the process. *Deep Sigh*

Leaving that decrepit organisation behind, let's take a quick trip to Davos, where the yearly jamboree of world leaders, movers and shakers takes place. Granted, a lot of worthy and well-meaning individuals turn up to fight the good guy's corner, but it is very difficult to swallow the wanton waste of money this must be for countries like Nigeria, where our resident problems definitely do not sit comfortably with such excess. As if that was not bad enough, we have President Goodluck Jonathan grant CNN's Christine Amanpour (no less) an interview where he basically became a fiction writer!!! Not cool at all Sir....you should have known we would all be watching and listening. You should have definitely stayed in your zone!

Lastly, let's talk about one of my heroes...a man who doesn't give a flying fudge about zones. He just wants to blow sh*t up! What piece on the current ways of the world would be complete without the mention of the cuddly dictator Kim Jong-un. What a crazy week it has been for the Nuclear one. Still steaming from the accusation he had undergone plastic surgery to look more like his grandfather Kim II Sung, the poor little rich boy now has to deal with UN sanctions! All this after Pyongyang had been generous enough to grant an American, honorary North Korean citizenship (where is the gratitude?). On top of all that, the South Koreans had the gall to conquer the pop world with Psy!

Of course now, the Great Leader has no choice but to threaten nuclear war on all and sundry. Oh, by the way, for those who are not of political leanings, a word of advice. Wherever you hear North Korea threatening the US, please replace those two letters with South Korea. It's a code that only a few of us understand, but one that every single South Korean is totally aware of.

Little Kim is not only prepared to leave his zone, the cute-looking, teddy bear of a man is bloody looking forward to it! Some crazy guys at NMA TV put together a video which you have to see:




Could the last person left in South Korea please turn off the light....

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